Koinonia

I was leaving the office yesterday to go pick up lunch for some folks who were in an all day meeting. On my way down the stairs I ran into a guy who looked the part of someone in need of some help. I introduced myself to a man named Dominique and asked if i could help.

Working at a church in a highly congested area this is a common occurrence. Situations vary and it is always hard to discern what my response ought to be. I have a friend who works a lot with people in need and he says that "must be moved by compassion but we can't be led by compassion." He has some wisdom on the subject and so that statement has informed my thinking. 

Another friend of mine has told me to be quick to give a hand up but cautious about handouts. I guess what they mean is that if we are just giving a handout then we perpetuating a much bigger cycle and we aren't helping much. I think there is wisdom in that too. But when you look a guy like Dominique in the eye it is tough to know which of those he is looking for and, quite frankly, it is difficult to care.

If you live in Atlanta like me then you know that these last couple days are colder than other winter days in the south. When Dominique told me he needed somewhere to stay for the next two nights before he got his social security check I knew enough to know this was not the first time he had been in this position. I found out later, in our search to meet his need, that he had exhausted resources available to him through the local organizations involved in such affairs. But man, it was going to be cold and you don't look a guy like Dominique in the eye and send him back into the cold. Dominique has a wife and 2 children, one of them only 5 months old... They were staying with his wife's parents where he was apparently not welcome. He said he was from around here but had no money, no job, no other friends he could call. What he didn't say that I heard him say, was that he had no hope. 

We always talk about the poor, the homeless, the disenfranchised or marginalized as if their great need is money. We say they need to get jobs and work, earn a living and contribute to society. I think those are really good ideas and very helpful to one's livelihood. A couple of other people at the office helped me and we got a burrito from Willy's for Dominique and called some shelters and places that were better equipped to help him out. Like I said, it was cold. They were mostly full. We found one place downtown that said if he could there in an hour and half then he could have a bed for the night and food for the next day and they would give him a chance to work and stick around for a while. It was pretty good option from my vantage point. I offered him a ride or to get him on marta but he said no thanks... he would just try to get his wife's family stay there. 

I don't know if he was telling the truth or lying or looking for booze or a job or a place to stay. I don't know if he was looking for handout or a hand up. What I do know is that his lack of money, employment, shelter wasn't his biggest problem. The temperatures last night are nowhere near as cold as it is in Dominique's soul. His real lack was lack of hope... lack of relationships. I was thinking last night that if I was out of money, had no job, lost my house and my wife and kids, what would I do? Wasn't a tough question... if i was desperate or in real need, I realized that I had dozens and dozens of friends I could call. Even if i had made a mess of life with bad choices I literally have a hundred people in an instant that would offer their help. 

I am praying for Dominique today, not so much for shelter, a job or money, but for a person... that another person he meets today would look him in the eye, ask his name and communicate speak some kind of value over him. I think some of those other things will happen for him, but real poverty and lack, at it's darkest and most raw level, is isolation. 

Koinonia is the greek word for "fellowship", which Luke uses to express the shared experiences of those people in the very first church community. Koinonia is about relationship and sharing life with people, which is central to emotional and spiritual health. Without it, regardless of your success or what you possess, you are in poverty. My prayer today is that someone, somewhere will have a divine encounter with Dominique, and something in their spirit will reach out from deep inside and breathe light and warmth into his cold, darkened soul. Because if you stumble into hope enough times, it is increasingly difficult to overlook her. And once she catches your gaze, well, it's a whole new ball game.